Friday, July 17, 2009

Rodent Wednesday

Wednesday and Thursday were very funky days for me... My dark passenger was riding with me both days... A friend of mine blogged about her dark passenger and so I'm stealing her phrase, I hope she doesn't mind!

Actually, I was fine until I got a call from my Aunt JoAnne. As you know, I love this woman so very much and have been so close to her for soon long. Needless to say, if something's off with our relationship, it really bums me out. Anyho, she called me to "tell me some things before I went down to my Dad's". Ok, no biggie--or so I thought. A prelude to this story is that we (we meaning myself, Mr. Peyton, Ean, JoAnne, John David and Barry) were extremely upset that while Dad was stroking out, his live in girlfriend of more than 15 years left and went to pet-sit for her daughter in Richmond. Squirrel, as Dad so sickeningly refers to her as, is a very odd duck...opps, and odd rodent? Isn't that what a squirrel is? None of us have been overly fond of the infamous Squirrel. She's not a mean-spirited person (I don't think) but she's definitely weird! I think the icing on the squirrel feeder came when she moved out, bought a house in Richmond, lived there until my Dad almost finished building his house, then sold the place in Richmond and moved back in with him, professing her undying love for him... I've never trusted her again and quite frankly, seen her true colors. My Aunt and Uncles and I have had many conversations about this rodent, and are all on the same page about her, but have bitten our tongues. Actually, Dad and I have talked about my distrust of her, but he says (and I quote) "I'm staying true to my Squirrel"... BARF! Ok, prelude over, JoAnne proceeds to lecture, if you will, me on it not being the right time to say something to Squirrel about not being there for my Dad. It was a blow, I must say, but not earth shattering. I told JoAnne not to worry, mum was the word, while I couldn't help but think what does JoAnne think? Does she think I'm going to go down there and cause a huge scene? Especially as sick as Dad is? I've kept too quiet for 15 years, where is this coming from? So, we continue to chat, she called me from work mind you. Jody (short for JoAnne, duh) has only called me from work like 4 times in my whole life! Three of those times have been death situations... This dawned on me too...
"Gale (the Squirrel's proper name) doesn't know where you stand, she is worried because she knows the tension between yall, she doesn't want to step on your toes, but rightfully so, she's really worried about Jack's finances and stuff" Jody sheepishly begins. "You know, she can't do any of the paper work, because you are the next of kin and with them not getting married she has no legal rights. Angie, I know you're really put out with her for not coming back while your Dad was in the hospital and all, and I am too, but I do think she's worried about your Dad and I do think she's worried about you. I told her that yall should sit down and have a heart to heart talk" Jody added, a little too fast for my liking. "Well Jody, I don't understand, really, what you're getting at" I say, feeling an odd sinking in my stomach. JoAnne is our peacemaker, if you will. JoAnne is now the mother hen of our clan. JoAnne also tells each of us what she wants us to hear...until she's mad, I will add. All that being said, I've always thought Jody and I had no secrets. I thought she told me everything, good or bad, whether I wanted to hear it or not. Suddenly, I was feeling like maybe I didn't really know how she truly felt about things--mainly, me.
"Well, Gale's worried, basically, that you hold everything in your hands".
"Has she said that, what in the world, all I'm worried about right now is my Dad and she's already let him go without his meds for 1 nite and her and I both need to be concerned with his health. This other stuff is going to have to wait" I say, with a trembling voice.
"That's just it, it can't wait Angie. You know Gale can't take care of the things that need to be done, hell your Dad does her checkbook for her, YOU'RE going to have to do all this stuff Angie. Gale says she'll get a job in September to help bring in some money, but until then YOU'LL have to get him signed up for disability, etc."... JoAnne goes on.
I listen to my aunt ramble on about all the stuff I need to do and take care of. Of course, I've thought about these things, but again, Dad's health is at the top of my list of priorities right now. Furthermore, when did Jody become this advocate for the Squirrel? Jody ended the ramble on a note to the sound of "I really feel sorry for Gale right now, I just think yall really need to talk".

Poor Mr. Peyton was the first sounding board. To my surprise, he was more upset than I was!

About an hour and 1/2 later, I get to the farm to check on Dad. The squirrel greets me with a hug (sickening sweet) and Dad is this hollow stranger that I've been introduced to since Saturday. Squirrel quickly tells me under her breath that she's got some stuff to talk to me about. I bet you do. I begin to follow up with some drs that Dad talked to and made 2 appts for him. I bring up the financial aid papers that I filled out for him for the hospital bills and that kinda opens up Pandora's Box. "While we're on this subject, I want to tell you what I want" the hollow stranger that's shuffling around in my Dad's body slowly says. "You know Gale's behind the 8 ball, because we never got married and I need to look out for her". (ugh, behind the 8 ball, he totally regurgitated that from the rodent squirrel and never got married--duh!)
"Well Dad, I just assumed when Gale moved back after you built your house, she had life time rights" I got a little dig in.
"Yeah, that's what I want"
"Well, of course... I just can't believe you or anybody else would think I'd think or do anything different" I croak. Tears were stinging the back of my throat, hopefully it didn't show in my eyes. Although as out of it as Dad is, he wouldn't have noticed anyway. The rodent doesn't know me well enough to know if I was ready to burst into tears or not.
"Well, you're my contact and person, so I want you to know this and make sure she's taken care of"
"Of course Dad"
The conversation turns to other things, calls that need to be made, etc., all by me of course and I amble through. The entire time, I'm glaring at the rodent, wondering what all she's saying to my Dad. Where is all this coming from? I mean, of course he loves her and wants to make sure she's not thrown out on her butt (yeah, he said that too), but what are they saying? Have I ever given them a reason to think I'd do such a cruel thing? Yesterday I couldn't say NO, I HAVEN'T GIVEN THEM A REASON TO THINK THAT, today (Friday) I can! I can't believe my Dad didn't even say, I know you wouldn't Hoot Owl, I'm just voicing my wishes. I felt crushed.

Later on in the visit, Squirrel told me something that I didn't know. Something that made JoAnne's call kinda make sense. Squirrel Rodent told me that her, Dad and JoAnne talked "way before your Dad got sick" about if anything happened to him, what would Squirrel do. She has since talked to JoAnne (and Dad) and the plan is that if my Dad happens to die before a car hits the squirrel, JoAnne and the Squirrel will become roomies, at the farm and split the costs 50/50. "It's a win-win" the Squirrel grins, like rodent in a trash can full of yesterday's leftover meatloaf. Hmmm....

So, now I feel like Jody's call was as much for HER benefit as it was Rodent's. If I were to upset RS (rodent squirrel), then her marvy situation of getting away from her deadbeat boyfriend (of like 100 years) would be screwed. Hmmmm... funny, I have NEVER heard about this plan. Don't get me wrong, it's great if my aunt were to move into my Dad's house after he passed away (God forbid), but why have I been left "behind the 8 ball" about all this? Especially since JoAnne is so concerned w/ me being the one in charge of everything. See where I'm going with this?

My dark passenger rode back to Southern Comfort with me, jabbering away the whole time. Damn him... He was with me the rest of the day and all night and all day Thursday. I could do nothing but flounder around the house in a haze. He was there, distracting me from everything. I hate that Dark Passenger! I really do. But you know, I can't blame it all on him.

God is Love--Peace Out



1 comment:

  1. well in my humble oppionion... I have to say that 12 years ago when she moved in maybe someone should have thought about "getting the milk for free". If she was not good enough to marry for the past 12 years; then let it be. Sounds like she has not had a job or been contributing anything to the house hold. She is whining about Jack not bringing money in; she is a big girl and if she want the disability then she can write his name on a freaking paper cant she? I think rodent should be the one to step up to the plate. She has been free loading for 12 years and Jack as "cleaned up" after her for that long maybe she should have learned something and she can take care of him. Which does not look like is going to happen cause she can't give him his medication!! If she cares for him and wants him to get better and live longer the medication should come first. Then tomorrow the disability, the financial aid. I mean how hard would it be for her to fill them in and get him to sign them? Maybe if the rodent doesn't get hit by a car she can go live with her daughter that was more important while Jack was stroking out. Because, bottom line, he DID NOT marry her for a reason.

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